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Make your own kind of music~

Here I am again.

It's been forever and a day. I'm not sure why exactly I decided to write once again today of all days. I've been trying to make to do lists with all the stuff I know I should be doing and I haven't been doing lately (like, in the last YEAR), calling friends and see how they are doing, buying stuff for my apartment because I can't keep living without proper chairs and I need something to kill plant bugs, cleaning up my computer files, finish off a bunch of books... One of my "to do" was write here, because I've wanted to, all year and a half I haven't, because I do tend to feel better when I write things down, and it helps me remember moments and feelings, and I can be both superficial and deep in the same paragraph is I want to, and I like that, I like this, I haven't "out-grown" it. I still don't like facebook much, I can't keep up with twitter. I like to rant, and I haven't, in all this time!!

But, I wonder why I decided to do this now, write now, when my mood is kind of weird (actually, I'm kind of dizzy because I went to the blood bank today, maybe that's why), but I'm good at contemplate life when I'm in weird moods. September was a crappy month, pretty much the worst September ever since ten years ago. That doesn't help. But the month is finally ending, I'm trying to have a better outlook in life, and in december it will bee my ten year anniversary in LJ. I kind of want to celebrate it. And I kind of have to write here to be able to celebrate I've been here! (plus my English is crappier than ever because of my lack of practice).

So, what have I been doing since I last wrote here, in May of 2012? Lets see...

In June of 2012 my cousin Max came to visit from Denmark. The last time I saw him before last year was in 2001, when he was 9. He was adorable when he was 9, let me tell you. Now he's all grown up and his British girlfriend Abby came with him and they stayed with us for a month. Ever since 2010 we have been reciving visit from relatives from all over (Canada, Germany, Norway, Denmark) once a year. While I've liked them all, Max is the only one so far directly related to me, and because we keep in touch with the family in Denmark, and my mom and my aunt are kind of similar, it wasn't hard to feel the familiarity with him. Abby was very nice and sweet as well, I liked her dry British humor. I think they had a great time with us, because when they found out my parents were traveling to Italy this year they decided to book a trip there as well and hung out with them in Venice. The only downside was the lack of free time that means having relatives at home for a month.

In July, Max and Abby left, just in time for me to get sick. I ended up in the emergency room with influenza and later bronchitis. That happened, of course, because my room was damp all through winter, cold as hell, and it got flooded a day before I ended up in bed. So my room was my room no more and after a couple of days sleeping in the living room like I used to do when my grandma first came to live with us, I took over my little brother's bedroom. Thankfully, by then the apartment I had decided to buy had its paperwork already in process, so I only had to wait a month as a refugee in my own house for it to be usable. Sadly, by then I was so incredibly bussy I didn't have time to move!

And then, it came August. The first half of the month was stressfull because my boss was leaving us and we had to close lots of projects before that and before I left for my well-deserved vacation time. Which I did. I spent the second half of the month in New York, visiting Niagara Falls with Lupe, and then the Big Apple on my own. It was AMAZING. I didn't plan the trip with a lot of time, because I only came to the idea at the end of June when a promotion from the airline was available and Lupe managed to plan part of her trip there to be with me. It all worked out, I had a great time there. There were lots of stuff I didn't get to do, but there were lots I did and I definitely want to go again. I totally get why it gets so much fuss. I liked LA and San Francisco as well and the little town of Sanpoint Idaho, and people in all those places were incredibly nice, but NY was awesome (I have a thing for chaotic big cities, that's why I liked Mexico City so much as well).

It all came crashing down pretty quickly on my return to Chile, though. I didn't even got on the plane back home and I found myself with the big bosses of the company I work for in the airport. It's a big ass airport! and my bosses managed to take the same flight than me. I should had know how things were gonna go from then on...

September 2012. My direct boss had just quit, and I took her place. Ever since then I think I've grown a lot as a profesional, learned a lot, but damn it, I've been exhausted all year long. I've become a workaholic and a perfectionist even more so than before, and while I work with a lot of people that are the same way, there are several others who are the complete opposite and are a pain in the ass to work with. I like my workplace a lot, but it's ridiculously chaotic, and the last year, specially the last few months, I've been working myself to the grownd to get things done.

And that's why I'm here now, I guess. I've had enough. I have started crying without proper reason three times now since last August (I was tired, people were screwing up, things weren't getting fucking DONE). Crying is a stupid reaction I have when I'm angry, not when I'm sad, but it looks like that, very pathetic.

Anyway. After the specially crappy month I've had, I want something better for me. I want time for me that feels a bit more productive than just watching TV and reading fics. I haven't finish a book since forever...

In October 2012, I finally had time to move to my own place, my apartment. I love it there. Sometimes I miss my parents and my brothers and the fact that the fridge was always full, but I see them once or twice a month still, and it's nice to have my own space, specially after not having a place at all with the leaks and the flood and the humidity. Hell, I still have trouble sleeping when it's raining because a part of me thinks a leak is gonna shower me in the middle of the night. It took me a while to fill it with actual furniture (specially curtains!), but now the only big thing missing is chairs, and to hang my pictures and posters and paintings.

I've become a fan of plants since then. I still don't know much about them, and I've had several losses in the process, but because of my schedule I can't keep a pet, so plants keep me company.

In October I also finally finished the course I was taking on Environmental Law. It was a good enough course, some things could have been done better, but I got to take lots of stuff out of it, so I'm glad I took it. I'm glad it ended in October as well, because it was taking way too much time by then. Sadly, this year was a bit useless in academic achievment, but hopefully next year will be better. Either taking another course or working on my thesis, of which I have done nothing about in three years.

I don't remember much of November of last year. It was all work and making my apartment a place fit to live... Ah! But something good I started doing, I started running! As it turned out, one of my friends from work lives a block away from my apartment, and she loves running, so she convinced me to run with her sometimes. I haven't really slim down or anything (I eat and drink too much crap to be able to), but for the next few months until February I ran either on the weekend in the park close to my new home, or sometimes in the mornings before work (now I live closer, so it wasn't such a problem to get there earlier. I stopped doing that once the weather got bad during fall and winter, but now I want to start again, and to do that I signed up for a run next November. Lets see how I do.

I have lots more things to talk about, what I've been doing and then of course talk about fandom and I have to go around LJ reading what everyone else have been doing, but since I got to a pretty positive point, and I'm still at work and I have to go eat something to stop feeling dizzy, I will leave it at that today. I'll try to continue tomorrow.

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